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The blend download —
Protection.
Dandelion, Rock Rose, Lobelia…and Durga.
🖤✨Durga✨🖤
Where the flowers meet the Goddess...
The download…
Lobelia... they have this way of untangling psychic knots and cords, unraveling crossed wires, parasitic energies, thoughts, stories, wounds.
Wetiko is a Native American term, referring to a mind-virus that is plaguing humanity, attacking us in unconscious spaces in the psyche. This is not my place to teach, I don’t know about the history or origin of this in depth, but I mention it because the essence of this phrase came through strongly.
(This song ✨ “The Virus, by The Halluci Nation)
These flowers, the Lobelia, felt like they were extracting thoughts and energies that infect, and embed themselves, and take over our mental and psychic space, creating a lot of suffering.
Think even the angst of what we're becoming, accomplishing, and doing. Whether in our career or in the healing realms of enlightened perfection, or the stress of the hustle, and making money, or knowing enough.
Scarcity and greed.
Consumption.
Think capitalism. Wanting more things. Body image and the beauty realm, and the relationships that can happen with our bodies, and hijack our life experience.
Resting with these flowers, I’ve gotten the image of the way monkeys will comb through one another's hair picking out mites, lice, ticks, dirt, dandruff — anything that needs to go — but they were picking through the neural pathways and wiring in our brains.
It was this purification.
This cleansing.
She almost felt dreamlike. Like you could finally surrender and be freed from whatever head congestion in energy and thought was consuming you.
And she was holding us.
You could be held.
And safe.
In peace.
It was motherlike and gentle…
Then the dandelions popped off.
The roar of a lion.
They are playful.
Child-like.
The innocence of emotional ferocity.
Fucking spunky.
But they work with stuck anger first.
There’s this undercurrent where they reveal the toxicity of anger that is gagged and suffocated.
They reveal suppressed truths as they coerce what we have shoved down to the surface.
It can be uncomfortable when it starts to move things because it can feel like you’ll lose yourself to it. It can feel like you're going to, or are, losing control. Like you’ll burn it all to the ground. And you might. But it almost taunts you to let go and lose control so the truth can finally be revealed.
I once heard Maya Luna speak, and she said: “What if you’re not triggered, and you’re just angry?” And that has stuck with me so strongly.
Especially for women who are very empathic, emotionally aware, spiritual, and do a lot of self-work — we can rationalize everything to a fault.
All kinds of different people, I’m sure.
For some, compassion is easy.
Understanding the bigger picture is easy.
There can be so much forgiveness and broad sight that we can also lack the ferocity or harshness that’s sometimes needed to really protect ourselves.
What if you’re just fucking angry?
What if logic is completely out of context?
Why can’t that be okay?
It’s not your job to make everybody else, and everything outside of you, okay.
But it's a slippery slope to free-range your rage, too.
Maya Luna also said, “Anger is not abusive – anger is an emotion.”
I’m talking about the feeling, and harnessing it is the trick.
What we do with it, and how it moves through us, can very well be destructive and dark.
But shutting it down is also dark.
It’s simmers, and infects.
And starves us at the same time.
It feasts upon us.
We need places to move it. To move our bodies, move our voice, move our words, thoughts, and feelings, in a place that can hold it all. And unfortunately, a lot of times, there aren’t a lot of options or a lot of outlets. (My Somatic Journey Classes are for just this, and they are made for you to work with the essences there.)
And expressed anger can be scary.
We need somewhere to be held and to let that all move and speak and transpire, where it's not a toxic spill, infecting our lives and one another.
Anger is a tricky one.
And I’m not here to claim any sort of all-knowing expertise because it runs deep. And it can be all tangled up in trauma and trauma responses. But I do know a lot of people have been severed from its “healthy” embodiment, for lack of a better way to say it.
It either takes over and feels out of control and destructive, and can be a reign of terror, or it's so stuffed down that it’s making us sick.
The dandelion, and its combo with the others, brings to the surface what needs to be faced, and this blend in its entirety is holding space and giving guidance on how to do that.
Then there was rock rose.
Rock rose was the one that came through like a pillar, but it wasn’t in bloom, and by the time the blend started to take shape, the foliage came in strong, calling a bundle to be put in, assuring me that the essence of the blooms was in the plant even though they hadn’t physically blossomed.
The first time I made rock rose, I was walking and felt like I dropped ten feet underground, almost like Alice falling through the tree into Wonderland. I landed in the movement of Harriet Tubman and the Underground Railroad. The flower came in as this protective field, this force, this healthy, vital veil of secrecy that wouldn’t let anybody fucking in that wasn’t worthy of being there. And when I say worthy — I mean in service of the greater good of whatever a particular space, or being is immersed in, alchemizing, processing, holding, etc.
The bowl was surrounded by obsidian.
And Durga was there.
The dandelions had started doing their thing when I started a meditation session, and as soon as I closed my eyes, tiger eyes were as clear as day. I could see the shape of its face, the stripes. The name Durga repeated itself, and I felt her.
Again, I don’t know about her extensively, or much at all, but I’ve felt her before.
In all honesty, I looked her up on my phone after sitting for some time, and it said she’s often depicted riding a tiger or lion, and she is a great mother goddess, a warrior goddess, and a fighter of evil.
Not just a protector, but a warrioress weilding the power of good over evil.
A big theme in my life for some time now, and in deep relation to the greater essence of my work and this space, is around the evil in this world.
The violence.
The hate.
The control.
The vampiric domination that plays out.
In the way the earth is treated, animals, women, children, the people – all beings. All Life.
War, genocide, all the phobias and isms.
Physical extraction of resources.
Pollution.
Extinction.
Carelessness.
The entitlement in perceived hierarchies and the injustices in the systems and structures we live in.
And it doesn’t always look, play out, or manifest as you think.
It can be hard to see it right under your nose.
Or within yourself.
Sometimes it’s in your face blatantly, and more black and white. And sometimes it’s murky. It’s not so direct. It’s complicated.
It’s way more grey than we often realize.
Especially when you’re looking at it or experiencing it close to home.
Sometimes it’s more this collective infection of sadness, of disconnection — from one another, nature, the unseen, and to the universal harmony that we are not living in honor of or in attunement with collectively.
And it can manifest as depression, anxiety, mistrust, loneliness, rage, insecurities, hiding ourselves, or melancholy.
The roots run deep.
If anyone has seen Bugonia…it hits home.
Durga represents the power of good over evil, protecting the cosmic order.
What I’ve felt sitting with this blend is that it brings to the surface what evils are at play within you. What's infecting you? And to be very clear — I do not mean you are possessed by darkness, or that bad things are in you, or anything like that. I mean the pains of the universe and our states of collective disharmony that are creating suffering.
What messages have made you feel you’re not worthy?
What goals, actions, and thoughts are consuming you that are disconnecting you from greater universal truths?
What blind spots, armor, and pains are blocking connection with the people you love?
What stories are alienating you?
What ways of life have separated you from nature, the earth, the divine? What ways of life have left you exhausted, sick, and sad?
It’s all systemic.
I don’t care what religion or spiritual faith you have; it’s about connecting to something beyond us.
The greater essence of Life is much bigger than us, or what’s in plain sight.
All of these things — these contemplations, personal struggles, and questions — though they may be personal, they are greater than you. Meaning that their orgins are far beyond any single individual.
We are bound.
And we are all dancing with the same virus/es.
I could say nothing is good or bad, and maybe this is part of our evolutionary process. But either way, atrocities are happening, and I do believe their roots all come from this same vein of disconnection.
Some of it is downright evil, cruel, and heartless. Regardless of how it became severed from the heart.
This is why the feminine matters so much.
It’s symbolic.
What is severing a deeper connection with your loved ones, the earth, and the divinity of this Life?
The sister wound.
Mother wounds
Daddy issues.
Brotherhood of suppressed vulnerability, intimacy, and emotional shutdown.
Relational issues.
Homophobia.
Misogyny.
I could go on, and on.
But to some degree — it’s all the same.
This blend came through to cleanse the virus.
This blend came through as Durga.
I don’t have the answers, and the flowers' answers will be different for everybody. They guide you. You take them and open to them like you would spirit or unseen consciousness, and listen.
That is why I love the essences – they speak to you.
They meet you.
The messages they have for you may be very different than the messages they have for me.
All our answers and all our paths are not the same.
This blend is very complementary to the Boundaries and Inner Child blends.
The Boundaries blend is an expansion of our capacity — in receptivity, and in the amount of energy we can hold and channel, in combination with the protection, it’s a powerhouse. The Inner Child blend protects our innocence, magic, and faith in our ability to manifest, commune with other realms, and to create otherworldly realities in tandem with other dimensions. These three were made and channeled in a close window of time together, and have a closeness to one another to work deeply.