Dark feminine energy.
Feminine energy is largely projected as weak, and dark feminine energy is largely projected as sinful.
All feminine energy is bound to the heart, and our shapeshifting, intuitive, felt-sense nature, but dark feminine energy is particularly bound to our sex – our eros. It’s rooted in very taboo realms of the feminine.
Dark feminine energy is the fire of our feminine energy. It’s holy rage, death, destruction, creation, passion, pleasure, and the I don’t give a fuck, sensual, sexual feminine energy.
A woman empowered in her dark feminine energy is unwaveringly unapologetic of herself, and fiercely aware of the waters she is swimming in as a woman.
She has embodied the predatory nervous system of the huntress, the shamelessness of the bitch, the lunacy of the mad woman, the indulgence of the whore, the magnetism of the seductress, and the magic of her female form as the witch.
There is so much that has severed us from the unapologetic claiming of our birthright to exist. Our fire that knows this is being attempted to be snuffed out every which way we look.
The sexualization of women has severed us from the power of our eros.
The sexualization of women has birthed a longing in women to be desirable and to feed on the power of that. It’s severed our hearts and spirits from our sexuality, and it’s reduced pleasure to our genitals. It’s also bred violence against women, which slaughters the innocence of our sexual energy and makes the power of eros very challenging to access because it doesn’t feel safe.
The objectification of our bodies has severed us from the pleasure of our sensuality and our instincts.
Our sensuality is tasting, smelling, hearing, and feeling the life around us like braille – creating a deep intimacy with life and our bodies, while fostering a deep attunement to our instincts.
Also, the projections of weakness and sin in the feminine have severed us from our intelligence.
We’ve been conditioned to think that our hearts and needs are weak, that are intuition is less than, that our worth is conditional, and that our happiness and power are dependent on toxic constructs of patriarchy and capitalism – which then also severs us from the power and sovereignty that can be accessed through patriarchal and capitalistic structures of society.
The demonization of our rage, power, and money has severed us from our sovereignty.
The lack of care in the structures of society has feasted upon our empathy and hearts, consuming our life force, draining our vitality, and leaving us all burnt out and in over our heads.
Dark feminine energy holds the tension between the toxicity bred and the potential of power that is untapped.
The dark feminine sees what is sick, and it sees the liberation available while finding a way to dance in integrity without starving ourselves in the name of the emaciated martyr. She does not deny the heart from the dark, and she is not careless or hard. It is her heart that stabilizes it all and keeps the dark pure.
Awakening our dark feminine energy requires us to come home to our bodies, our pussies and our hearts intimately – not necessarily sexually, but somatically. Our bodies and our pussies are sacred vessels of intelligence. We can’t awaken this energy in its purity without dismantling the stories of woman, the female body, the feminine, our power, eros, pleasure, or without tending the ruptures of woman in our heart.
We need our sensuality, we need our sexual energy, and we need our eros to thrive – but this doesn’t need to look in any particular way. It’s about how it feels inside. It is our energy, our bodies, and our intelligence in relation to the very unique context of our lives, and it gets to show up however is true for us.
Maybe that means you are a whore in your sex, and maybe that means you’re celibate. Maybe it means you are loud in your rage, and maybe it means your rage is a palpable fire that is rarely spoken because you wield the force field of it so powerfully and gracefully. Maybe it means you are a leader for masses of women in your community, and around the globe, or maybe it means you are a leader spreading your medicine in your partnership, to your children, your best friends, or your family.
Nobody gets to tell us how to be a woman, and the dark feminine will raise her sword for this.
Freedom is a state within, and it’s a state of you giving yourself absolute freedom and permission to be exactly as you are. As simple as that may sound, it can be tremendously hard, and you are most likely going to need the dark feminine’s sword to dismantle the shackles you find yourself in.
It can be hard to speak when we want to. It can be hard to let our rage move when it’s there. It can be hard to build our capacity for pleasure when we are in a constant state of angst, overwhelm, or exhaustion. It can be hard to befriend our bodies when we feel betrayed by them and dissociated from them. It can be hard to unleash our sensuality and sexual energy when we’ve been demonized for it, or when we have been emotionally, physically, or psychologically violated in this way.
Our dark feminine energy is a force.
It’s not for the faint of heart. It’s also not to be forced – we have to build our capacity to hold and channel this energy. It is historically charged in a way that can feel very unsafe or scary to embody – and historically it has been. Presently, it sometimes still is. We cannot force our bodies to feel safe, it takes time, and this is big energy.
Dark feminine energy has become taboo. It’s largely deemed sinful or rebellious, but even when it is allured as the type of rebellion that is sexy and powerful – it's the shadows of the dark feminine we are taunted with. We are taunted with the closed-hearted, untrusting, manipulative version of these dark feminine embodiments to keep the true power from us.
We are not shown the empowered versions of dark feminine energy.
We are not shown the empowered versions of dark feminine energy because we would become uncaged — we wouldn’t be able to be tamed, muffled, dialed down, controlled, or dimmed. We wouldn’t comply, we wouldn’t care what others said, what others thought, whatever we were threatened with, because all the power we could ever want would be found within our own vessels, and once we taste what we’ve been starved of, there’s no turning back.
Dark feminine energy is hidden from us.
It is intentionally construed to be camouflage so that we don’t see it, so that we don’t touch it, and so that we don’t taste it – because if we did we would realize the power that we have, and the power that we have always had.
We would realize when we were being gaslit in partnerships that are toying with us. We would realize when the toxicity of the patriarchy was speaking through our loved ones and we would redirect them instead of being redirected ourselves in self-doubt. We would realize when our empathy was being used as bait to trap us. We would realize when we were being pursued not to trust our anger because it would free us. We would realize when we were being strayed from our own pleasure because it would liberate us and light us on fire.
We would realize when our faith was being used as control. We would realize when capitalism and patriarchy were diluting our worth because of our power. We would realize when guilt was blinding us of our worth and deservability. We would realize the potential of pleasure and joy in our bodies that we didn’t need anybody else, or sex, to access.
We would realize that the discomfort and distrust with other women was designed to be there and separate us. We would realize that the gender wars were designed to be there and separate us. We would realize the insurmountable power we have as women, and we would no longer relinquish it to the illusions we’ve been drowning in.
Dark feminine energy has an extra flare of being unapologetic and fierce because all the tributaries of the dark feminine are not wanted in the structures of society today – it’s a threat to what is oppressing us.
If our instincts and truth are overridden by worry of making other people uncomfortable, triggering them, hurting their feelings, or if our sense of worth is overridden by needing validation, getting permission, fitting in, or receiving another's conditional love – we will never be free.
If we unquestionably abide by how we think we are supposed to embody the feminine, the dark feminine, or the identity of woman, we will never be free.
Dark feminine energy is controversial, and it will not always be well-received. But, by owning it, we get to be our own most profound lovers, while genuinely knowing the gift that we are if anybody else is willing to meet it.
We have all been conditioned to varying degrees to worry about how others will receive us as we embody woman – how they will react to us, think about us, and how they will, or will not welcome us because it does and has mattered – our social and economic safety is bound to certain social conditions and to push against these conditions is a risk.
The question you have to ask yourself is if the risk is worth taking.
Depending on the context of your life, for some women, this threat, this risk, is more tangible, physical, and presently real than for others. So if you have the privilege to take this risk without risking your life, do it in the name of yourself, and for all the women who do not have that privilege.
The power of our dark feminine energy is tied to the power of our heart, just like all of our feminine energy, but she is fierce. She is fierce because she knows she has something that is threatening to a social system of dominance that is dependent on her complicit nature.
What we are taught is weak, and what we are taught is sinful must merge. This is the edge where our dark feminine energy dances, alchemizing the tension between the two. Even the dark feminine is shapeshifting. Even the dark feminine ebbs and flows in softness and ferocity, but the embers of her fire run hot, and it is a fire that cannot be snuffed out.
The embodiment of our dark feminine energy does not mean denying the beauty of caretaking, of unconditional love, of tending, or of service – but it means not being deceived into abandoning our power to do so, nor does it mean being shamed into relinquishing our power to do so.
The dark feminine serves from the power of serving ourselves.
We need more women to step into these flames, and the reality is that we do not all have the capacity to do so – so if you do, it’s time.
It is time to light the world on fire with these flames.
With marigold love,
Abby
